The Homecoming

We made it home today. It was a long week. Actually today was her official due date so maybe we can just pretend the last week didn't happen.

We are so stoked to be home, but really, more than anything, we're stoked Rigley doesn't have any more wires and tubes hooked up to her. Changing a diaper as a rookie is hard enough (that's right, my first diaper change EVER was last Sunday). Changing a diaper and putting her in a burrito is really hard when you have tubes coming out all over and if you bump them they set off alarms across the county and everyone comes running. Ooops. My bad.

We actually found out yesterday that coming home on Friday was a possibility. There was some discrepancy amongst the docs as to what exactly constituted 7 days.
...

It was going to come down to putting on weight so Jen and I loaded up our pockets with rocks that we could sneak onto the scale if need be.
"That's funny, how come the scale says she weighs 27 pounds?"
"She's eats all day and doesn't exercise, what do you expect?" *nervous smile*

All in all, the hospital was a little rough, but we really got through because of our friends who could visit, the love of family no matter how far away, and some amazing nurses and doctors (Carleen and Donette, you made everything so easy).

We're enjoying the quiet, the fresh air, and the chance to try out the 3 swings, 25 slings, and 850 outfits we have inherited over the last few months. That and the chance to be parents trying to bumble their way through this. This should be awesome.

Many people have asked (when they could get a hold of us) how we're feeling about being in the hospital after really wanting to avoid this place and have a home birth.

Here's what we believe is true for us (other people get to decide what is true for them so we're not trying to preach to anyone else): Giving birth is not a medical condition that requires hospitalization. It's a lot like digesting food, keeping your eyes moist, or growing hair (insert your own joke about my head here). Giving birth is a little less common than those things and a way bigger deal, but the body still knows what to do. You're not sick when you're pregnant, nothing is broken that needs fixing. So it was an easy choice for us to birth a child in a place that increases our chances of no medical interventions.

A kid being born with pneumonia IS a medical condition. It's what hospitals are for. They got turned into birthing centers over the years, but hospitals are where sick people go to get better. It was an absolute no-brainer to get Rigley to the hospital ASAP. We feel great about it. We have gotten great care and Rigley is going to be better off for it.

Jen has survived remarkably well being around so many needles and machines. Who would have though that the woman who gets sweaty palms when she drives past a hospital could live here for 7 days.

Update: There is a good chance we'll be home tomorrow! Hooray. Rigley has so far proven that she can pound some calories and put the weight on (Atta Girl!). We're not getting our hopes up, but the chances are high. Either way, we're looking forward to locking ourselves in our own house and sleeping in our own bed. Maybe the dog could have a homecoming this weekend too.

Best Joke So Far...

Jen loves Halloween so much, she gave birth to a kid in a Smurf costume.

Everyone say hello to Sumo Smurf!

Rigley-Watch 2009 Continues...

Life in the hospital is strange. Completely disconnected from the outside world. We left yesterday to grab something from home and get some food and there is a whole world out there that seems peaceful and unaware of our plight! How inconsiderate!

We sometimes find ourselves getting greedy and asking 5 million times, "When can we go home?" "How much does she need to eat to be able to go home?" "Our blankets are dirty, can we get some fresh ones?" And just when we start to feel indignant that our kid is not on the top of everyone's list, they wheel another kid in followed by another worried family. Your heart just breaks for the babies that need surgery to survive or are still touch and go. We feel unbelievably lucky and have been sent here to be humbled. It forces us to absolutely recognize the gift we have been given for what it really is, a miracle.

It makes me sad to think that the universe believed that we needed this lesson in order to treat this blessing with the respect it deserves, but who are we to know? No matter how painful, annoying, and exhausting this process can be for us, we have the easiest road of all the families in the NICU. I say this not to diminish our experience, but to enhance it. To stay conscious of the truth: we'll forget all about this soon and we'd be lucky to retain even an ounce of the appreciation we have right now for little Rigley's life.

Brief update: Things continue to improve every day as a whole. People here all talk about the "two steps forward, one step back." We have had our steps in both directions. Feeding is hopefully going just good enough for us to leave. As tough as breast feeding is anyway, success of feeding is what will send us home. No pressure there, thanks. She'll get it eventually and we have lots of support. We just need to keep our spirits (and energy) up. We use a lot of humor and Jen has begun referring to one of the nurses as "The Vampire" because she is always having to stick Rigley's foot to draw blood.
Peace.

Born a Cub Fan - Doomed to a life of misery or new good luck charm?

Just wanted to pass along an email from my brother:

"So while you were busy giving birth to your kid the cubs were coming back from a 7-0 deficit. Lee homered in the ninth off of wood to tie it and they won it in the 10th. today they came back from a run down in the 13th again off of wood. Could rigley be our good luck charm. i think so. hope all is well."

I'm pretty sure the Cubs were down until Rigley came out. This year is the year.

I'll take this as a good sign!!!

Link to the photos site

Hey All,

Update for today: Things continue to go well! Rigley is completely off all breathing support. Hooray!! We are going to be here at least until Friday. They are going to administer all 7 days worth of antibiotics, just to make absolutely sure she's cool to go home. Fine with us.

We've had one positive nursing experience so far and looking forward to more.

Thanks for all the warm wishes and support!

Here is where you can find more photos:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/39447467@N08/?donelayout=1

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!!

You bet your ass Happy Father's Day!

We're looking pretty good here people. If you check out the picture on the top, you will see (or not see), the absence of a breathing apparatus. We got to come off all breathing support this afternoon and she is still doing really well.

Today we have been working on nursing. Seems intuitive doesn't it? Well, it is not intuitive for us. Yet. But we're being patient. It's hard to be patient though when everyone is getting so frustrated. We are a little lucky though because she is getting all the nutrients she needs through an IV in her umbilical cord. If she were nursing well, it would just be a bonus.

Mom, Dad, and baby are all doing well right now. Sleep, eat, poop, that's the routine for now!

June 19th, 2009!

Howdy folks!

Well, the moment we've all been waiting for has arrived. It arrived yesterday. Or should I say, she arrived yesterday. That's right.

Rigley June Johnson-Leck hopped out into the world at home on June 19th 2009 at 4:01pm. She weighs in at a healthy 7lbs, 12oz. I forget how long she is. Long enough. She's not missing any parts as far as we can tell.

More about the birthing story later, but here's what you need to know: She went a little purple/blue as she was coming off the placenta. We put her on oxygen and she pinked right up. Took her off oxygen, back to purple. Well, it was pretty clear the she needed some help so we rushed off to the hospital and were admitted to the NICU. They did a bunch of tests and got her on oxygen. After lots of time and tests, it turns out she was born with pneumonia. I always thought Jen was cold blooded but, who knew you could catch a cold in utero?

So they started her up on antibiotics and a breathing machine to help her not have to work so hard and she settled in on her first night's sleep.

Today things continue to progress along. She's on regular air just like everybody else, no extra oxygen, and she's been stepped down to the lowest breathing supporter machine you can get. Good news for everyone. We may even try breast feeding tonight. And you can't suck a boob without having breathing figured out.

We should be here for a few more days maybe a full week and then back home with a clean bill of health and a new, more feverish obsession with her breathing. We'll trade shifts just making sure she isn't blue.

Otherwise the family is doing well!

Guest Blogger: Jen Johnson and the long walk.

Hi all, it's Jen. I've invaded Chris's blog. I get to make a guest appearance to tell you about my "long walk." The idea for the long walk started to develop in early February. I was at a retreat in the mountains with some of the college students that I teach when I got the idea of doing a 100 mile walking meditation over 5 days in preparation for parenthood. I thought this was the GREATEST idea ever!


As most of you know, I'm naturally kind of a "do-er" so I don't leave much time in my life for reflection, and reflection seems like a kind of important thing to do prior to a huge life change like having a munchkin. As I shared this idea with other folks, I was SHOCKED that they didn't think it was as awesome as I did. My well-intentioned colleagues were concerned that I'd go into labor from walking so much or get abducted (even though they think I'm borderline crazy 90% of the time, these are perhaps the most loving coworkers a person could ask for). They insisted that I take the office cell phone "just in case." I complied.


Believe it or not, the big walk evolved into something a little smaller over time (as is usually the case with "Jen Johnson 'hairbrained ideas'"), but turned out to be awesome.


So, as you can imagine, our life has been pretty busy lately. School just ended in mid-May and we are swamped with commitments until then. Meanwhile, we (and when I say "we" I really mean "I") had quite the pre-baby "to do" list. Time just kept slipping away until the Friday before Memorial Day weekend and I hadn't planned (let alone executed) the big walk. If it was going to happen, this was the weekend.


The walk ended up being a 2-day, 30 mile trek, mostly on trail. I stayed overnight at our friend Mark Benn's house (thanks Mark!), who has a stunning place with a beautiful view of Horsetooth Reservoir just west of Fort Collins. I got to walk on the Blue Sky Trail, through Horsetooth Mountain Park and Lory State Park, and then took roads and the paved Poudre Bike Trail home. I got to see some wildlife (thank goodness no rattlesnakes, though) and even slept on a few picnic tables. :)


I expected the walk to be about me getting "mentally prepared" for parenthood, but it turned out to be something completely different. Ultimately, it ended up being a really cool bonding experience between me and the little person. At one point on the trail, I ran into a heavily tattooed mountain biker who enthusiastically asked, "so, you're taking the baby for a walk???!!!" Exactly! I thought a lot about how cool it is going to be to have a munchkin in Colorado: I can't wait for the first 14er climb, camping trips as a family, and even exploring the Poudre River in our own backyard.

Despite other's hesitations (and our midwife asking us a week later, "did you consider asking me about this?"...oops...), this was was one of the best decisions that I've made in pregnancy and is something that I will remember for a very long time. I'm now even considering the name Blue (as a middle name) because we spent so much time on the Blue Sky Trail together!

The Unshower

So last weekend we finally caved and threw ourselves a shower. We got a little bit of pressure to have SOMETHING for people to show support, but we both were having nightmares of sitting in a room full of people opening cutely decorated presents filled with onesies and an electronic baby wipe warmer-upper. To avoid the nightmare scenario we tweaked the typical shower thing and funneled people's generosity and support into categories we felt reflected our values. It became know as - The Unshower!

For those of you who were there, thanks so much. It was awesome. about as perfect as we could have hoped for. For those of you who weren't there, you can still participate if you want to.

We shared a meal (courtesy of Carmen, Monica, Linder, and Dora), stories and even had a couple activities.

We set up a video booth where people could record a quick video that we will watch during early labor. Songs, jokes, stories, support, whatever. We ended up with 22 videos that we have not watched yet, but are very excited about. Feel free to submit a video if you want. Since we're at home for the birth, we'll have plenty of time at the beginning to watch the videos and feel connected and supported by all of our community!

People could also sign up for meals and dog walks (didn't feel comfortable asking people to help with cleaning and gardening, but you can offer that as well). Anyone not signed up can contact Meredith, who has graciously volunteered to coordinate people. You can email her at meredith.dickinson@colostate.edu

Finally, we are creating a "treasure chest" for the kiddo that we will give her/him on her/his 18th birthday. What we're asking people to contribute is a small token/symbol/charm/whatever and then attach a note to it with a wish or some advice for an 18 year old about to embark on a new part of their path. (Maybe a rock from your favorite hike and a note wishing the kiddo many adventures.) The treasure chest will be open for a while so there is no rush if you still want to contribute something.

Sorry not everyone could make it to the Unshower, but since there are a couple things people can still do to participate, I don't feel too bad.

(*The above photo is someone's idea of a joke. We did get our picture taken holding up a onesie, though this one is signed by all the guests and will go in the treasure chest too.)

Picasso. Monet. Johnson-Leck.

Go ahead.

Take a few moments.

Take it all in.

The beauty. The detail. The love that has been poured out in acrylic form.

If you can peel your eyes away from the photo above for a few moments, I'll tell you a little about our art project. This is from the book "On the Day You Were Born." It's a great book. A little human-centric, but it does make you feel pretty special. The text on the right hand side is talking about the various migrating animals of the world(Arctic terns, reindeer, sea turtles, etc) that are spreading the word that our child is being born. Nice of them, considering it'll take a while to get out the birth announcements. CLick on the photo and see if you can find the migrating puggle. We really like the book and the artwork that goes with it.

We painted it in one weekend (and did not argue ONCE!) doing a little freehand, but used a projector for the hard parts. Important to note that we chose not to paint it on the wall because apparently "weird parents" paint murals on kids' walls.

So the kid's room is coming along. Actually, it's the "kid's stuff's room." Tons and tons of stuff in there, but no kid. No kid for probably the next year!

The kid isn't going to be down there for a while because we plan on having the kid sleep in our bed with us. Don't worry. Calm down. Euchre will still have a spot in the bed. The candidate most likely to cough up some space is also the largest mammal in the bed. Some people may have some reservations about "co-sleeping," but it is really beneficial and safe for all parties involved. A friend of ours said "Hey, you're going to be up all night making sure the kid is still breathing so you might as well roll over rather than walk across the room." Makes sense to me.

So the beautiful piece of artwork will have to go unappreciated for a while, except by visitors. And us. And we're pretty proud.